5.12.09

Creative Dreaming

It is very interesting to me that after my yesterdays dream symbolism, I was watching this amazing documentary "Unmistaken Child" about the reincarnation of the Lama Konchog~~;)!!

It wasn't my primal intention to write here most of time about my dream world, but my life in such a high degree is evolving around it! I feel it is worth to share with my own insight and experience, if there is a chance that someone can get inspired to work with own dreams as well. There is way too much people still getting stuck on the basic level of nightmares, without evolving of the ability of creative dreaming! It is such a great hidden potential being wasted!

I feel very blessed that through my life experience I was pushed in this direction. My dreams it was quite a nice alternative and escape from my reality, except that by some years of my childhood I was having often nightmares. Following my intuition and learning from experience I was learning how to overcome it. At first I came up with a trick of rolling my eyes up, when I wanted to escape my nightmare into waking state. Later when I've been chased once by a witch, that wanted to hurt me, I started to talk to her, and we became friends! My nightmares ended up exactly with this dream;) Since this time every night was bringing for me a lot of excitement before my next explorations and adventures. I trained myself early to remember my experiences.
Before I even started to photograph nature, by whole year, almost every day, I was practicing photography in my dreamworld.
Whenever I saw a beautiful view, I was becoming conscious, and I knew that I have always camera with me. The more I was focusing on seeing beauty in nature, the more beauty I saw, and my dreamworld amazingly expanded. All was reflecting into my reality, and I was opening myself more and more into seeing it everywhere. With every time when I've been going to forest, I was setting for myself an intention that I am able to see more and more clearly and deeply. I am amazed how it actually worked, and how it affected me! With time my life was catching up to my dream visions, and my dreams were becoming my reality.

Whole my previous knowledge in this direction was based mostly on my own experience, and I decided now to study this matter deeper, also learning from others, so I can explore more fully from the true potentials. Some time ago universe sent to me this book by Patricia Garfield - "Creative Dreaming". I've started reading it before, and after reading just a little, I had this very lucid dream where I was flying, and I was teaching my partner how to do it as well. Later I get distracted by other books, but now I decided to go back to reading it. I am still not finished, but already I learned a lot, and it is very exciting to put new learning into practice.

Today I had a dream where I've met with my dead grandfather, father of my mother. In reality he wasn't very open or friendly, and I've never felt to him a deep connection. I see him in the room where he used to live by a long time, and he is very nice to me and we are engaging in conversation. He offers to me a gift, a ring with the bright blue stone. I am thinking then that it is very nice from his side, but with this gift it is hard for me to benefit also others, that it is just beautiful thing to look at. I ask him about other gift that will be more beneficial for all. I see he holds a camera, and he hands it to me. By a long time I am looking at the world around me through the lens, and I see all the picture sharpens and gains more focus.
This new camera actually manifested in my reality few days ago! It is for me a big shift for the way I perceive, stepping into the new higher levels. Photography it is such a wonderful tool for evolving our ability to see..
It starts all with the inner landscapes though..

4.12.09

Kepher

Today in my dream I have a walk in the night. I am coming across the most beautiful temple that I have ever seen, all pure white, and basked in a perfect light. Whole building is covered richly with the most magnificent sculptures. I am looking closer, above the gate..I see beautifully carved large mandala, with the ancient Egyptian symbol of scarab with opened wings, carrying the sun! I woke up with the feelings of bliss and amazement by this sight, which imprinted deeply in my mind.
I see this dream as deeply profound, and I know that I have to bring this vision to life through my art.

~~I am dancing at the edge of the worlds~~

24.11.09

Golden Sun




I'm pretty much obsessed in this days listening over and over again to album "Golden Sun" by Lucette Bourdin, and it is really hard to stop! This release is available for free download here.

It is one of the greatest masterpieces I have ever heard! Automatically it jumps to the top of my favourite music!! Actually 'listening' word isn't here very appriopriate..as you can know it only through experience, exploring its infinite depths through going within, and travelling with it with your astral body. It is very powerful, and contains a huge potential for creative use! Masterfully crafted channeling of the divine!
Lucette also gives me a lot of hope and inspiration by her own example. Through her whole life she was a painter, and she creates music only from 5 years!

Now it is for me time to be more focused on my visual arts and expanding my skills in this direction, but there is also an asleep musician in me, waiting on the right time to be awakened!

12.11.09

Solar Culture in the time of change




My partner, Steven Eye, serves for Tucson's community from 22 years.
In the downtown he found an abandonned building, and turned it into world class art and music venue, where extatic energy happens. You can see here all the time changing art of over a hundred of local artists, and to experience music from all over the world. Many of great musicians were starting from playing here. He devoted his life for inspiring and empowering of others, throuh creating this sacred space, and bringing back goddess culture through his sculptures. Something about six years ago city officials promised for him that they will help with making sure that he or non profit organization is owning the place, so it is left for the community and is turned into museum, preserving his work. All this time he worked very hard fixing place for his own money, and sculpting it all over, being inspired deeply by the art nouveau sculptures of Praque. As the time goes by, and the state wants to sell properties with our building included, the city has its chance to save us before public auction. However this never happens because of other priorities..like for example saving already dead building demanding at least couple millions of dollars to exhumate it. This was for us very heart-breaking news. It is very sad that people in power by their ignorance are not able to appreciate a great treasure, hidden right in the city's heart!

In recent time we went for a public auction. Steven was working with Warehouse Arts Management Organization, and together they managed to organize funding for buing the place.

Few days before the auction we went to nature, to ask about some messages and guidance in our matter. In the first day I spent some time meditating in the cave. It is like my magical rock sanctuary, with one of the most amazing trees growing in the middle. I figured that now it is also house of the snake. In one place I found fragments of eaten animal, some fur and paws. I was travelling very deeply within, sittng on my rocky throne, exploring the invisible realms. I saw some of very intricate and complex spherical life forms made of light. In the infinite Now I felt like I'm travelling into the future, where again, like the ancient ones, I am open more fully into my real potentials. I also connected with the tree, I became the tree, and all the rocks around became the mirrors of my mind. Leaving the cave I felt like I was born again from the womb of the Mother. My old ego dissolved and again I was brought to the union with my True Self, opened to the universal love.
Coming out from the shadow into the light, I found myself in a true paradise!
Everything was so beautiful! I filled myself with a deep gratitude. For the first time I took with me into this place my video camera and tripod. I was setting everything up. In the first half minute of my filming I suddenly hear the sounds of a huge wings. I look up, and I see three bald eagles circling around the beach, exactly where I was!! I just couldn't believe it! It was the first time when I saw this magnificent and powerful birds in the wild! I felt so blessed, and in the right place, in the right time..

When the night came we made our first fire after the summer. Giving thanks for all those on the other side, and asking higher powers for assistance, we did our own ghost dance, dancing our visions with intent.

In the next day at morning one of my first sights it was grey heron.
Later bald eagles came back! This time two of them were chasing a raven.

My partner had also interesting encounter with the prey of the eagle, the fish, probably rainbow trout. He was kayaking and she was hanging out with him by half of an hour. He was even touching and petting her and she was coming back!
In one moment two military fighter jets flew by so very low below the top of the mountains! Their crazy sounds broke the nature's silence.

On the way back we saw a dead skunk, and one small bird jumped right in front of our car and probably got killed..We saw one of the most spectacular sunsets and one of the most beautiful moons.. A lot of messages, which we were trying to embrace and understand..

In the Night before the auction I have a dream..I keep this little puppy in a box, but he is looking like dying. I am worrying that I am not caring about him well..I am wondering if I gave for him enough of food, or maybe I keep him in the box by too long. Someone is bringing the mother dog. She starts to lick the puppy, and I see him coming back to live. In another scene I see some of my artwork destroyed. I also see myself standing and sending an airplane into the air..It flies up, but very soon it goes more and more down. It turns like a boomerang, and crashes in front of the building where I was! I woke up in perfect time before the auction, and after this dream I knew that not will be so easy. One rich developer became fully committed to buy our building and didn't wanted to let go. We had backing with money, but we couldn't go into a bidding war with him, and to bid very high. We would have to pay in our rent any extra money, if we want to stay, and we couldn't afford it. We just had no chances to compete with his funds and we had to surrender. It was very difficult and painful for us, that anyone with money could just come and buy our place! We heard many stories about this man, and we knew he have pretty bad reputation. Almost everyone fears him. I was thinking that he is exactly like a spirit of bald eagle! It is not a very nice bird..but very powerful..

However we were forced to go beyond all this judgements of other people, as he expressed his willingness to work with us and he wanted us to stay. We thought that anyway owning anything is such an illusion.. This whole experience brought for us many important lessons..we were already in the state of total detachment, and open in surrender to whatever happens.

After coming back from the auction I felt tired, and I took a nap. I remember I was riding my bike up the mountain, and later I found myself very high on the rocks, overlooking a magnificent body of water. There was a crystal clear and very calm lake. The water was like a glass and I could see the bottom very well. Next to it there was flowing the great river. By longer time I was observing its effortless flow. This dream brought a lot of peace into my mind. It reminded for me that we are just moving with the flow of life, and that soon clarity and peace of mind will be attained.
The bald eagle's totem entered our lives and became our new teacher and guide.
And we are not its prey! With time we are more and more clear about hidden order and great potential in the whole situation opening up. It is like a new beginning for us, and vision of the future brings a lot of excitement!!

16.10.09

Nanoclock

Today releases on atmoworks debut album by Vladimir Kozlov "nanoclock" with my artwork!


wings of visions



Returning to our beloved place in nature, I've made a walk through the canyon.
I was opening myself deeper to the other senses, of the smell, of the hearing, to the feeling of the swirling gentle wind touching my skin. The desert teaches you how to be super aware.
In one moment I noticed very spectacular butterfly landing on a rock, I approached him closer and very quickly and intuitionally I looked into one place on the ground.
And there were waiting on me two beautiful butterfly's wings! What a great gift from him, I thought. In the next day, walking into the cave, I found an amazing, visibly freshly empty butterfly's cocoon!
His spirit is sending me a message: "It is Now the time to leave your old cocoon, take your wings and fly freely!" Many times I thought that I am beyond the phase of leaving cocoon, but the more I thought so, the more I was presented with lessons showing me that I have still a long way to go, and still I was finding myself struggling. Healing work seems like never-ending and I can see how in many situations I was still conditioned by the past. With my creation I feel all the time like such a beginner, having in mind the higher vision of opening to the full creative potentials. Also from this reason I thought that for now I have still so much to learn, that 'one day', when I will learn 'enough', I will start to create in freedom. But meeting with this butterfly reminds me that there is only Now, and that in this present moment I have all I really need, and that I am ready to fly freely if I choose so..if I am brave.. The cycle of self-transformation and learning is never-ending indeed. I accept this wings in deep gratitude, I give up my old self and my past, and I choose to be reborn to the higher reality, where my work is an effortless flight and dance!

2.10.09

Floating in the stellar sea..

In the infinite Now, I am expanding my gratitude
for ALL that IS
for Divine works of the Universe
for this great Intelligence
Everything here is so greatly synchronized and in perfect order!
We are able to see it when we rise beyond our egos to our true nature, of who we truly are, as we look up to the stars, when we forgive for everyone and we unite..
We each have so wonderful and unique gifts to offer, with which we can contribute to the whole
we are the one strong force when we work together
Even if we think that something is "wrong", there is always hidden lesson for us to learn..in this Earth school..designed for our higher development and self - realization. It keeps returning until we learn.
We should end up with our judgement what is right and wrong, and to go beyond, to experience our true selves found in the stillness of the mind.
It is time to remember our stories, and to awaken for our divine purposes.
With hearts open to the Universal Love, grounded in the beautiful mother Earth, reaching up to the heavens, we shine, and we create a songs of our hearts, transforming all matter..so we may awaken also other parts of ourselves..
so we may become whole once again.

28.9.09

Rainbow Visions

We survived the new art show opening. In order to "finish" my new piece,three nights in a row I was drawing to 8am at the morning, with break on sunrise meditations. Through the whole time in the day we were hanging new art. In last night I didn't went to sleep at all, and I took only in Saturdays afternoon two hours of nap. Next time I choose to not do it for myself!

Though I'm glad I was able now to contribute with this my new creation..so I can move on to the new projects. The opening was great as always, and art it seems that is better and better with each time! I think we all inspire here each other through sharing with our visions from our sacred space within, in this sacred space without.

I feel so much better having lots of rest. I had today some of very profound and beautiful dreams! I was walking together with my partner in nature, near the very old and magnificent trees, and we see how two rainbows are forming in front of our eyes! One of them was a little further in the distance, and the other one was so very close to us! And they were so vivid and intense! This view gave me a feeling of deep bliss. I took my camera and I tried to capture this beautiful rainbows..and later I was looking closer to this majestic trees. They looked like few hundred old and were wonderful in shapes and textures. I think I saw there some of huge rocks too..
In the day time, afternoon, I felt like sleepy again and I took a nap in my studio.
This time I was seeing an amazing vision of a drawing with many cobras!

In this evening to bring myself closer to experiencing of my newest piece and inspired by the dreams, instead of pushing myself to do lots of work that "I should to do", I choosed to still myself, ground in the Earth, and awaken my kundalini energy in meditation, so I can build the rainbow bridge to my higher self.

24.9.09

Sacred Space

We are right in the middle of exchange of the whole exposition in our gallery. It happens three times a year..last time on our walls there were 125 of local artists showing their work, it happens that we have more.
This means that we had to take down all the art, each artist have up to 3 pieces..
We have three days when we are open for the new submissions, they all come with the new art and they pick up the old..we are accepting all the art, we take no commission, it is free to show.. We are putting everything up, we make labels for each piece and clean the space, and in Saturday evening the whole art community meets on a great opening. There is a potluck and everyone shares with food, and we have live local music on our stage. It is always so inspiring atmosphere! At this point we are usually exhausted, but it is always so worth to go through this all! My partner is doing it from many years..
It is for me such an inspiring experience to be surrounded by all this art! I feel I am learning through this a lot!
Traditionally at this time I am not sleeping much as I am putting myself in unimaginable challenges to finish my new pieces
Though I would love at least sometimes to break this pattern and to be more relaxed~~;)
On the other hand I know that I am doing it subconsciously intentionally to accomplish more and to make a good use of this energies..it always pushes me beyond..

7.9.09

Ad Astra!


My first solo art show here in Tucson was very humbling experience to me;p!
There was many wonderful things for which I am very gratuful for, though I ended up being sad about the whole thing at that day.
It is not an easy thing to be an artist!
It was good experience for me to see some of my art up on the walls, I realized deeper how much more I have still to learn. I am not that very happy with my painting side, and after long break with working in this ways I feel like a total beginner once again..but I am willing to transform it!;-)
I am reading right now two very interesting books..
"The Last Ghost Dance" - a Guide for Earth Mages by Brooke Medicine Eagle, and
"A Passion for This Earth" - exploring a new relationship of man, woman & nature by Valerie Andrews. This is so perfect for me on Now! I am totally absorbed and I am learning a lot!
From The Last Ghost Dance I feel like I expanded today much deeper my understanding about coming of a Golden Age, I looked into it from some new ways.
It is always very intriquing to me that one of my first very profound dreams from my early childhood that I remember, and which get stucked deeply in my mind by this all long time, it was a dream where I look into dark starry sky, and I see a map on this sky..I look closer, and I see the picture of Aquarius!
..the light-bearer who pours the water of Spirit down upon us from a beautiful jar..
I also noticed that few of my the most profound dreams in my life it was always the messages from the stars!~~;)
It is pretty exciting to live in this times!
On our journey home it is essential to reconnect once again to the Great Mother Earth and to the ancient wisdom that was forgotten..

23.7.09

Divine Messengers..



Time of the recent, very special New Moon Solar Eclipse in Cancer, together with my partner we were spending in our favourite place in nature. During my morning walk to the canyon I met on my path with a western diamondback rattlesnake. He was resting in this beautiful pose.. What a gift from the universe on my rebirth! I feel that rattlesnake is also one of my totem animals, my ally.. I try to shed my skin daily, also in another ways I use his medicine.. When I returned from my walk I found out that in the same time my partner had a very close meeting with a bold eagle!

Electra & Harmonium



The new albums of one of the greatest masters, magicians of sound - Pete Kelly, has been released in this month on Atmoworks.
I feel very honoured that once again I could serve with my artwork for his projects, as they means so much to me. This music is always an infinite source of inspiration and a very powerful magickal tool. I am traveling with this sounds to my origins, to the stars..it brings me to the union with my divine self, it gives experience of an ancient mind..it awakens me to my true potentials.

19.7.09

REBIRTH




...what a perfect time to start this blog as I got my new life!

Once again I die so I can be born again..